Parenting: You’re Doing It Wrong

July 29, 2009 By: erik Category: Funny, Offspring, Parenting, Photos 1,607 views

Rate this post:
1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)

Just a couple photos to share that shows how excellent my parenting is.

Underfoot. This was mainly taken for scale to look back on and see how tiny Nora was as a baby. Don’t worry. My center of gravity was completely on my other foot.

Also visible is my square of tanned skin that my iMacs give me every summer.

Having a beer with Daddy

She has a little trouble with the glass, which is why I’m building her a little baby beer bong. Naw, just kidding. She’s more of a white wine baby.

  • Heh. I’d never be able to get a beer that close to Eva these days… she lunges for any glass or bottle that comes near her and tries to drink from it.

  • I’ve made it clear to Sg that she’s perfectly welcome to try my beer, but after that first time (she was actually scraping at her own tongue to make the yucky stop), she always refuses.

    • Beer, wine, coffee, smoking, and a bunch of other stuff that adults are addicted to are disgusting the first time you try them. Perhaps because they are all forms of poison.

      • Or because they’re too effing awesome for the un-tempered senses to bear — pleasure and pain at the margins being the same and all.

        • My reasoning was via evolutionary biology. As a general instinctual rule, stuff that smells and tastes good is usually the healthiest, and the stuff that smells and tastes bad (e.g. rotten meat, poop, etc.) is usually what you shouldn’t be putting in your mouth if you want to survive long.

          The fact that the abnormal sensations caused by your body’s reaction to ingesting a small dose of poison can be pleasurable is sort of a fluke.

          But there’s no one that didn’t wince from their first gulp of gin or whiskey.

          • I was mostly kidding, but I feel compelled to point out that beer tastes good. (If somebody made a non-alcoholic beer that tasted like Dead Guy, I’d take it over a wide variety of regular beers with dinner.) Coffee tastes good, and I say that not simply based on my developed taste, but also because Sg enjoys the sips of black coffee that I give her from time to time.

            Also, there are a number of ways in which beer and coffee are good for you. I defer to your larger point, but take exception to your description of our species’ relationship with beer, coffee, wine and the like as a fluke. I’d prefer to say that it’s complicated.

  • See also.

    • I’d forgotten about that instructional tidbit you sent me a few months ago. Very helpful.

      So far it’s been tough to get Nora to hit the chess clock after she makes a move, but we’re working on it.

  • i think the photos paint a picture of an excellent parent…

  • Brilliant!